...So I was talking to my wife the other day and she drops one of her hypotheticals on me:
"If you could have anything in the world, what would it be?"
"Dear, I'm just happy to be with you."
"No, silly, if you could have one MATERIAL thing in the world, what would it be?"
"I'd be happy with my own private country."
"No, you're not getting it. One REASONABLE material thing. What would you want?"
"A billion dollars would be nice."
"NO! You're not understanding me. Ok, I was watching Oprah today..."
ok
...
So really, the question was, if OPRAH could fulfill one wish for you, what would it be? Well, I know Oprah IS practically a billionaire, or at least runs a billion dollar empire. But if she isn't willing to part with her dinero, here is a list of things that I would request from the Don Oprah:
1) Spend a day (or more ideally, a week) with Mark Cuban - yeah, I think he might be crazy, but most visionaries are. For some reason I have this image in my head that Cuban wakes up at 5 every morning, and over a huge bowl of Cocoa Pebbles and about 7 shots of straight espresso, watches Gordon Gekko's "Greed is good" speech from the movie "Wall Street" to get himself pumped up. You may think the guy is an obnoxious wannabe jock, but he's also got some of the most amazing business savvy and forward-thinking ability I've ever seen. I'd love to glean business tips off of him, watch the team practice, work out in their state of the art gym, and then go Euro-clubbing with Dirk.
2) Spend a weekend with the NFL films crew and break down NFL tape with Ron Jaworski and Merrill Hodge - If you're sick and tired of listening to the network drones go on and on with their hype-drivel, then the Edge NFL is for you. These guys really know how to break down game film, analyze what's going on, and educate the viewer. Every time I watch it I learn something new. Hanging out with these guys would help me be a better fan and also help me understand why my team the Eagles keep getting stoned in the NFC Championship game.
3) Go on a few tour stops with the Kenny Wayne Shepherd Band - for those uninitiated, KWS is the most prominent blues guitarist of the modern generation, is directly influenced by my favorite artist Stevie Ray Vaughan, and from time to time Kenny tours with SRV's old band. I'd love to hit the road with these guys, watch KWS play, listen to great music, and listen to all the great stories about SRV. It would be a real life "Almost Famous" moment. Short of building a time machine and going back in time to hang with SRV himself, this would be the next best thing.
4) If I did have a time machine, go back to 1992 and hang out with the first and only US Men's Olympic Dream team - Given the sad state that the US men's basketball team is, I must harken back to that time of MJ, Larry, Magic, and the boys. Hanging with them at the Olympics was probably like hanging with the Beatles in the 1960's multiplied by 1000. That would have been fine and good, but really what I would have wanted to see were the practice scrimmages. From what I've heard, those were where the memories were really made. Since I don't have a time machine, could somebody please find me those tapes???
5) Ride in an F-16 - For guys, there's a little "Top Gun" in all of us. I've read all sorts of horror stories from guys who have gone up and passed out, thrown up, thrown down, and spoke to the Eye of Sauron, but in a heartbeat, they say they'd do it again. I want to go to the danger zone...