NFL 2004, Revisited

I love football. Football, football, football. Here it goes down. Down in my belly. Mmmmm.

To celebrate the advent of the impending season, I thought about my five favorite subplots from last year.

1. Post AFC Championship after the Patriots had yet again dismissed the Colts, Boomer Esiason, Greg Gumbel, and Dan Marino are sitting around talking about Peyton Manning's failure to win against the Pats (yet again). Then out of the blue, Boomer straps on a set and says that maybe Peyton is this generation's version of Dan Marino - i.e. piles up the big stats during the regular season but can never win when it matters. This of course is said with Marino sitting to Gumbel's right, while Esiason is sitting to Greg's left. The tension, shall we say, was palpable. Marino got the most pissed off/screwed up look on his face, mumbled something about how he at least played in a Superbowl, and then did all he could to not show off his quick release-cross hook to Boomer's gargantuan melon-head. Truly riveting stuff.

2. In Terrell Owens' inaugeral season with Philly, when he was still T.O. the Good, they played against Dallas on Monday Night Football. Three different times, he made me laugh. The first was when, after his first TD, he ran to the little Dallas star in the end zone, stood on it, and spread his arms wide, poking fun at himself from when he did the same thing a few years ago on the big star at mid-field, causing all sorts of vitriol. The second was when he and McNabb poked fun at the media's overreaction to their 'argument' during the preceeding week, only this time it was McNabb following Owens around while they had a faux-argument, trying to make up. Great acting all around. The third was when T.O. came up to McNabb at the end of the game and gave him the "come on and give me a hug!" act.

3. Ron Mexico. No explanation needed.

4. Bill Blelichick's wintertime wardrobe. If you didn't catch it, it consisted of khakis, a blue Patriots sweatshirt, and a Patriots headband that kicked his whispy hair all over the place like he was in a 1980's boy band. Yes, he's a genius, but some time with Carson Kressler might be...well, it might be wildly entertaining.

5. Baltimore Ravens' Ray Lewis slowly turning into some cross between an aging Mike Singletery, Confucious, and the fairy godmother. Somehow he has become the voice of reason and empathy for all football players who have experienced trouble in the NFL. Also forgotten/unadmitted is that, not only is he no longer the best middle linebacker in the game, he's not even the best defensive player on his own team (hello, Ed Reed).

I am so ready for some football.